Ichigo and Rukia discover Fanfiction
by Nightsmoke
Summary: Self-explanatory.
1. Chapter 1

_Summary:_ Rukia uncovers a strange website.

**All characters © Kubo Tite**

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**Ichigo and Rukia discover Fanfiction**

**Chapter I**

"Ne, Ichigo, why do you get so many 'pop-ups,' as you called them?"

"Shut up," Ichigo replied comfortably from his bed to the tiny shinigami at his desk. "Just be glad I'm letting you use my computer."

Kuchiki Rukia looked over at him. "True," she replied. "The only computers in Seireitei are in the twelfth division for the Bureau, so we were never allowed to use them anyway…what's this?" She directed her attention back to the pulsing screen, giving a random click of the mouse every few seconds.

Ichigo sighed. As much as the shinigami annoyed him, he was glad to have her back. After the Bount invasion, after the whole Aizen incident…they were finally home and had some time off, even if it was only for a little while. With all the chaos in his world that consisted of things that no normal teenage boy should have to endure, Ichigo began to realize just how sweet leisure time really was.

"Eh?"

The orange-haired boy turned his head curiously at the sound. Rukia had her head cocked and a slight frown plaguing her features. Her dark violet eyes were a shiny white, reflecting the computer screen's brightness.

"Look at this site I found, Ichigo—ooh, they have manga!" Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Idiot, what did you click now?"

She answered, "How should I know? It says '' at the top though."

Ichigo shrugged. "Never heard of it. Stop clicking random shit or you'll screw up my computer."

"Fool," was her only reply. Her face brightened abruptly and she raised her slender fingers to the keyboard. "I wonder…" she murmured. He looked up at her sudden silence.

"Ooh, look, Ichigo! Look what happened when I typed in my name, come look!"

With a grumble, Ichigo heaved himself off the edge of the bed and sourly came over to the desk. Rukia was jabbing a finger at the screen excitedly.

"I typed 'Rukia' in the little search rectangle and all these results appeared!"

"First of all, it's called a search box," Ichigo began. He squinted at the writing on the screen over Rukia's shoulder. "2,665 results?"

"Hey look, they have your name too! And Renji's! And Kon's! And…who the hell is Grimmjow?" She broke off.

"What in the world is this?" She did not sound afraid, merely interested.

Ichigo would never admit it aloud, but he was harboring some curiosity of his own at seeing his name online.

"Well, click one and see what it says," he told her.

"Which one?"

"How should I know, dumbass? Just pick one."

Rukia grinned with anticipation and closed her eyes. She swished the mouse about and with her eyes shut clicked suddenly. Unfortunately she had opened her eyes too late and missed the title of the link she had clicked; the new page was already starting to load. Ichigo looked thoughtful from behind her.

Once the new page had formed, the two gazed at the writing.

"It's a story about us…this appears to be the fiction of the fans, if I'm not mistaken," the small shinigami said seriously.

"Why the hell would we have fans?" Ichigo asked, an eyebrow twitching sporadically.

Rukia bounced her shoulders in a shrug and gazed at the screen. Something had caught her eye. "Hey Ichigo, why do they have the word 'lemon' at the top?"

"No freaking clue. Scroll down."

_To be continued.._

_Uh oh. I forsee some trouble in the future chapter(s?). I won't be too cruel._


	2. Chapter 2

_IMPORTANT NOTE BEFORE READING:_ this chapter contains a 'synthesized lemon,' meaning not a real lemon but a humorous rendition of one meant to add amusement to the chapter, as well as poking fun at some overused fiction phrases. I don't write lemons, so writing a fake lemon was difficult. To all those who write real lemons: I mean nothing by this, so please don't be offended. Thanks.

**All Characters © Kubo Tite**

_Recap: Rukia bounced her shoulders in a shrug and gazed at the screen. Something had caught her eye. "Hey Ichigo, why do they have the word 'lemon' at the top?"_

_"No freaking clue. Scroll down."_

**Ichigo and Rukia Discover Fanfiction**

**Chapter 2**

Kuchiki Rukia's almond-shaped eyes glossed over the webpage in a violet gaze. This 'fiction of the fans' was a strange thing indeed. Not only had she found her name on the web site, but Ichigo's and others' as well; there were tons of stories about them to be found.

She had thought it to be a hoax of some sort, maybe the Technological Bureau's idea of a joke. Rukia could see them all too clearly plaguing Ichigo's computer to keep tabs on their favorite shinigami-substitute. But, observing the web site more closely, Rukia noted that it looked to interactive to be of the Bureau's doing. There were various authors, each with their own strange titles. It was unnerving.

The raven-haired shinigami had always been blessed with being a fast reader. Her speedreading skills had been one of the elements that had made her such an effective squad member back in her early Seireitei years.

Rukia quickly read the story that she had clicked on with Ichigo's mouse (she still could not see why it was called such a thing: it looked nothing like a mouse.). She construed it to be a sort of random, free-time story involving her and Ichigo even if she could not understand some of the phrases and terms used in the writing.

_What are they talking about when it says that Ichigo 'sweat-dropped?'_ Rukia wondered.

_When they write 'orbs,' do they mean eyes?_

She let the small twitches of a smile raise her lips as she read. The orange-haired shinigami and her were written eerily in character, almost as if the author had been continuously witnessing their everyday life. Which was rediculous, of course.

The story was taking a rather odd turn, Rukia noticed as she continued to read. It was almost as if the writer was implying that she and Ichigo were…

It was only due to her fast reading that she arrived at the bottom of the page quicker than Ichigo. Her indigo eyes grew wide and glassy and her cheeks became rosy as the words on the page implanted themselves into her brain. Her heart began to pound in her temples.

"I-I-Ichigo." She managed.

"Aah?" He asked. When she didn't give a rational response, Ichigo turned his eyes from the story and turned to look at Rukia, frowning with his typical Ichigo visage.

"What's up?" He saw how red her face was, and his frown deepened. "Oi, Rukia, you alright? Don't tell me you have a fever."

Rukia shook her head and gave a goofy grin, speaking in a faded, detached voice.

"Hehe, read this part, Ichigo…"

His eyes followed to where she was pointing, which was shamefully farther down the page than he had been.

"Ne, read it out loud…I don't think I got it the first time," Rukia said tipsily, an impish grin on her face.

"Why?"

"Just do it."

"No!"

Rukia gave an impatient huff. "Alright then," she replied coolly. "I'll read."

Ichigo looked at her heated face and shrugged, not even bothering to ask. After taking a breath Rukia started at the beginning of the paragraph and began to read in a theatrical voice.

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_"'Ichigo could not take it anymore. Looking at how the smooth, silky pajamas clung sweatily to her petite frame, how the folds of satin moulded themselves flawlessly around her supple breasts, it turned him on. Immensely. Rukia groaned in satisfaction as Ichigo slid his cool hands under her shirt and gently tugged the shirt off, fingers pausing to stroke her nipples fondly. Her breath quickened._

'_Ichigo…' she whispered, her breath warm against his bare shoulder._

'_Fuck me, Ichigo.'_

_Happy to comply, Ichigo pulled off his boxers. And Rukia observed that he was big. Very big._

_They met in a passionate kiss, tongues entwining and dancing frivolously inside their mouths as Rukia's nipples hardened. She traced the smooth contours of Ichigo's sculpted chest, a cool finger running deliciously down the bumps of his tight muscles. Her finger continued to descend until it reached that place where the sun never shines. Light fingers tickled the end of it and cupped the taut sacs underneath. Ichigo moaned with pleasure. He ran one hand through her pitch-black hair and used the other hand to slickly slide his fingers expertly into her—'"_

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**"AH HELL!"**

Rukia jumped in her seat, as if goosed. Ichigo had both hands clapped around his ears and a nauseated expression on his red face.

"Close the freaking window! CLOSE IT, I SAID!" Ichigo hollered, leaning over when she didn't respond to grab the mouse.

At his first attempts he missed the little "x" button, so in his exasperation the orange-haired shinigami gave up and jammed his finger against the power button. The monitor instantly went black with a little click.

Ichigo shook his head, as if shaking hard enough would expel the words from his memory bank. He spluttered for words, unable to string together something coherent for a few moments.

"What…the _fuck_…" he managed. Heat rose on his face as he failed to dispel the images the text created in his mind.

Rukia was still a bit miffed herself. And she thought that Kon had a warped mind.

This fiction of the fans, however, extended far beyond any sense of perversion that the stuffed lion could dream up. Luckily Kon was on yet another one of his "journeys," and was (thankfully) not present to witness the scarring of the .

Seriously, Rukia thought. The stories from that web site were more fitting to be in those naughtybooks that Shunsui-taichou always kept in his haori.

"I'm sorry, Ichigo, I had no idea," Rukia said genuinely.

"But you read it out loud on purpose!" Ichigo exploded, flailing his arms about.

Rukia grinned. "True. It was worth the look on your face, though."

"Rukia…"

"Yes?"

"I'm _never_ letting you on my computer again."

End.

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